Hey again. Just me sitting up at 6 o'clock in the morning feeling like expressing myself once again to the soothing sounds of key strokes. There has been alot on my mind as of late. Pretty sure you know what this blog might be about though eh? I've been trying to lie down and sleep for the past couple of hours, but my mind has been going a mile a minute tonight. Plain and simple fact is that I miss having the company of a woman by my side. Feeling the warmth of a woman's body and listening to the little noises they make while they fall asleep. I very much do miss that feeling I used to have.
There are your typical advantages of course about having someone of the opposite sex around, but I'll try not to get into that since as of right now that's not what I'm seeking per se. I just want someone here to lie down with me and someone I can cuddle in my arms while they sleep. Sometimes just having that is alot better than sex, and I'm sure there are a couple people that might agree with that. It's just nice to wake up and see that person smiling at you. It makes you feel like your the king of the world. Like with just that little smile, kiss, or snuggle into your arms makes you feel like you could conquer that whole damn world. Know what I'm saying? If not I don't know if you can pass as human. Everyone needs some sort of affection every now and again.
If you can't tell obviously I'm very much attracted to someone right now and in all honesty want to be with them sleeping right now. I sure hope you've figured that out. If not, don't tell me. Anyway, but yes that's what this is about. I am sort of falling for someone right now. If you know me well enough you know this to possibly be a bad thing to. I don't have too much of a problem hooking up with someone I know won't go anywhere, but when that opportunity arises that hey I could be someone in this person's life, I sure do know how to fuck up royally bad in that department. If Aaron is reading this he is probably nodding his head with a smile on his face, cause he knows how much of a problem it is for me.
My roomate and I had a decent chat tonight about the philosophies of life and how we interpret things we deal with everyday and I came to the conclusion that I think into things way to much. I really do. I think more or less about the potential consequences of my actions more than anything. Not that I do anything bad or anything, but when I know something is just not going right, I think about how that could affect me and a person's attitude towards me. I pick at every single detail in my mind and try to analyze the situation the best I can and then wonder how could I have done this better. I will admit and this is not me getting to down on myself or anything, my confidence is just fine, but I do feel rather inadequate sometimes. It just feels like I'm falling into a hole or something and I can't get out. I get so lost in thought about what I could have done that I almost want to attach a mute button in my head and just go with it, but it's hard for me. Another problem of mine and I will emphasize and once again some of you know this all to well...I do fall hard and fast. Good thing I also know things do mature with time.....
There are your typical advantages of course about having someone of the opposite sex around, but I'll try not to get into that since as of right now that's not what I'm seeking per se. I just want someone here to lie down with me and someone I can cuddle in my arms while they sleep. Sometimes just having that is alot better than sex, and I'm sure there are a couple people that might agree with that. It's just nice to wake up and see that person smiling at you. It makes you feel like your the king of the world. Like with just that little smile, kiss, or snuggle into your arms makes you feel like you could conquer that whole damn world. Know what I'm saying? If not I don't know if you can pass as human. Everyone needs some sort of affection every now and again.
If you can't tell obviously I'm very much attracted to someone right now and in all honesty want to be with them sleeping right now. I sure hope you've figured that out. If not, don't tell me. Anyway, but yes that's what this is about. I am sort of falling for someone right now. If you know me well enough you know this to possibly be a bad thing to. I don't have too much of a problem hooking up with someone I know won't go anywhere, but when that opportunity arises that hey I could be someone in this person's life, I sure do know how to fuck up royally bad in that department. If Aaron is reading this he is probably nodding his head with a smile on his face, cause he knows how much of a problem it is for me.
My roomate and I had a decent chat tonight about the philosophies of life and how we interpret things we deal with everyday and I came to the conclusion that I think into things way to much. I really do. I think more or less about the potential consequences of my actions more than anything. Not that I do anything bad or anything, but when I know something is just not going right, I think about how that could affect me and a person's attitude towards me. I pick at every single detail in my mind and try to analyze the situation the best I can and then wonder how could I have done this better. I will admit and this is not me getting to down on myself or anything, my confidence is just fine, but I do feel rather inadequate sometimes. It just feels like I'm falling into a hole or something and I can't get out. I get so lost in thought about what I could have done that I almost want to attach a mute button in my head and just go with it, but it's hard for me. Another problem of mine and I will emphasize and once again some of you know this all to well...I do fall hard and fast. Good thing I also know things do mature with time.....
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